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killer shrike
Tue Feb 28, 2006 at 08:07:29 pm EST

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The Adventures of Alcheman #28 Part Three
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The Adventures of Alcheman #28, Part Three


“Set Ups, Pay Offs, and Swerves”




“Yowza!” was Troy Callum’s reaction to the latest guest to the townhouse.



“Right,” Doctor Honoria Sesselby, PhDs in Cryptozoology and Cryptoanthropology (Miskatonic U.) sized up her greeter as well. She correctly surmised she was dealing with Smooth Operator, since the other male residents of Michael’s home fell into the categories of diminutive, geriatric, or horribly mutated, “I need to speak to Michael. Is he in?”

“Who’s at the door, Smoothy?” Whitney Spheris, Pop Nebula, came from the kitchen with her usual breakfast of Red Bull and Toaster Strudel.



“Why, it’s the young lady in Michael’s prom picture,” Amelia House noted from the top of the stairs. As she had not yet touched her Galeata Spot this morning, she was still assuming the form of a kindly old grandmother, “Such a pretty thing, though I must admit I think you looked better as a brunette.”



“So its safe to come out then?” Holotheredia Lad inquired from his hiding place in the toilet tank upstairs, “She’s part of Mikey’s Inner Circle, right?”



“I am Doctor Honoria Sesselby, and I am one of Michael’s confidants, Honoria told the almost assembled Joy Corps, “Now, where-“

“You’re a doctor? How come Alcheman didn’t call you then, when Varmint got sick instead of that nurse?” Whitney wondered

“Dude, did you see what that nurse was wearing?” Smooth Operator countered, “I’d ask her to make a house call too if she came in that get-up.”

“I don’t think Doctor Sesselby is that kind of doctor, dearie.”

“You are correct,” Honoria stated confidently, setting aside her bemusement at the mention of her prom picture, a “nurse” who was part of Michael’s “Inner Circle”, and the fact there was now a six foot sea cucumber-human hybrid toweling off in the living room, “I study extranormal animals and civilizations.”

“Well, Varmint’s sort of an extranormal animal. He might be the Missing Link or something,” Smooth Operator observed.

While Honoria doubted that, she did feel obligated to check on the condition of the man, since it appeared Michael was not home and had left his charges in a lurch, “Take me to the Varmint,” she commanded as she removed her calfskin jacket.

*****


Chiaki Bushido rolled Jenni Wooster and herself under the bed-frame just as the shaped charges detonated, sending a shower of dust and debris into the cell. Before the smoke had even cleared a trio of black clad men rappelled through the hole the explosion had made.

“Under the bed,” one of them noted in Japanese. He unsnapped a taser from his belt.

The other two men stationed themselves on either side of the bunk bed in order to lift it. While this happened Chiaki heard other explosions and saw flashes of light from out in the cellblock. It was a full scale assault.

The Psychic Samurai didn’t wait for the men to take away their cover: she charged, crashing into the taser wielder’s knees. He stumbled backward, grabbing wildly at Chiaki’s hair to balance himself. The warrior rammed an open palm where the mercenary lived. He gave a weak gurgle and collapsed.

“Don’t move,” the voice came from behind her. Chiaki glanced over her shoulder and saw one of the other soldiers had Jenni in what could be a lethal choke hold if he applied a smidgen more pressure. The third man had wielded a commando knife and was readying to spring.

“Enough!” a large man in ceremonial robes dropped into the cell.



The Brass Bushi stared down at the crouched form of his old rival, “Konichiwa, Chiaki Bushido. It appears you are in my debt.”

“What are you talking about, Toshiro Makazawai? I owe you nothing.”

“Not from where I’m standing, my dear,” he traced a callous finger along his sheathed katana, “I am rescuing you.”

“I did not ask to be rescued. Now order your man to release my friend and leave, before you get us into more trouble,” Chiaki rose, never taking her eyes off the latest trespasser into her cell.

“Who’s this: another one of your boyfriends?!” Jenni demanded while still the grasp of one of the Bushi’s men.

“Jenni, please, be quiet,” the Psychic Samurai entreated, “Toshiro, this is ridiculous.”

“No, what is ridiculous is your refusal to honor our debt of- of- honor! I am rescuing you, so that we may finish what we started.”

“You cannot force me to be obligated to you by kidnapping me. Such an act is a shameful violation of the Bushido Code.”

“Hey, if you’re not going to go with Jackie Chan here, I will,” Jenni elbowed her way free from her attacker, “No way I’m sharing a cell with you, you, you Jezebel!”

“Jenni, no!”

“You wish to leave, young lady?” the Brass Bushi considered, then grinned, “Very well.”

Toshiro Makazawai gestured, and his vassal put Jenni over her shoulder and scampered up a rope. The other gingerly made his way around Chiaki and gathered up his downed comrade in order to follow.

The Brass Bushi beamed, “It would seem that you have no choice but to accompany me now, Chiaki. Honor demands it. After all, you cannot leave your charge to my…. tender mercies.”

The slim young woman’s face became very severe, “You bring dishonor to your family with these antics, Toshiro Makazawai,” but she complied, grabbing the line and climbing to freedom.

Hovering above the prison was a massive, futuristic air transport. The machine bore a symbol that piqued Chiaki’s memory. It wasn’t until she clambered through the hoverplane’s trapdoor that she remembered where she had seen it.

A dozen agents of the Hero Elimination Revenge Project Extermination Squad surrounded Chiaki and pointed their energy rifles at her. The Psychic Samurai reluctantly raised her hands in surrender.

“Watch those trigger fingers, men: the woman’s fate for me to decide,” the Brass Bushi said jovially as he swung into the ship. Soon he was joined by the rest of his men and the craft began its departure.

The door to the bay irised open and the craft’s mistress sauntered in. She was flanked by a pair of ominously designed robots.



“Ah, velcome, my friends. I, Madame HERPES, promise no harm will come to you vhile in my care.”

“HERPES? Ew,” Jenni adjudged while still slung over the back of the Bushi’s assistant.

“Now, Miss Vooster, you should not be so judgmental about my title,” Greta Fokker smiled wolfishly, “After all, you vill be soon pledging your undying loyalty to me.”



Next: We learn the Brass Bushi’s plan for Chiaki, and Madame HERPES’s plans for Jenni. Plus we get to see Michael Wooster’s sort of first date with Constance Blott, and Honoria’s reaction to said event. Plus, a real live Legionnaire guest stars (Hint, its an old flame of Jenni’s). Out soon.







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